We're joined this week by Hussein Kesvani, staff writer at MEL magazine and author of the book Follow Me Akhi: The Online World of British Muslims. In a special holiday themed episode, Hussein helps us give advice to a man whose deep loathing of Christmas is a source of tension in his relationship.
Cleo Stiller is the author of the recently published "Modern Manhood: Conversations about the Complicated World of Being a Good Man Today." We talk about #MeToo and the private questions men have been asking, and sharing with her, since then. Later, Cleo helps us answer a question from a man whose drinking is leading him to say regrettable things to his girlfriend.
Our guest this week is Andrew Leland. Andrew is currently writing a book about blindness for Penguin Press. He’s a contributing editor of the Believer magazine and hosts the Organist podcast. We talk to him about the experience of slowly going blind over his adulthood - ways in which there is loss, but also ways in which it's simply changed things. He also takes about the changes in how people engage with him as his blindness worsens. Later, he helps us with an advice question from a college student in a complicated friendship.
We're joined this week by writer and Army veteran Adam Linehan. We discuss his experience serving in Iraq and Afghanistan and his recently published essay in the New York Times about his struggle with survivor's guilt and PTSD after coming home. Later, Adam helps us give advice to a man who is worried about his bad habits when his girlfriend is out of town.
We're joined this week by Matt Gutmann, professor of anthropology at Brown University and author of the recently published book, "Are Men Animals? How Modern Masculinity Sells Men Short." This book takes a look at the broad range of masculinities across cultures and questions whether biology can really be to blame for male misbehavior (spoiler: it can't). We talk about his book, his background and how he became interested in the field of men and masculinities. Later, Matt helps us answer an advice question from a college student who winds up on a bad date after a disagreement about money.
We're joined this week by lion tracker and coach, Boyd Varty. Boyd recently published a book called, "The Lion Tracker's Guide to Life." We talk about the art of tracking, his recovery from PTSD after several traumatic events (including getting attacked by a crocodile), his shift to doing coaching and his experience of meeting and living with Nelson Mandela as a boy. Our question this week comes from an actor whose work has dried up.
Our guest this week is Vox journalist Liz Plank. Liz recently published her first book, "For The Love of Men: A Vision for Mindful Masculinity". We talk extensively about how men are cheated by patriarchal attitudes about masculinity and Liz has done the research. Finally, Liz helps us with an advice question from someone who thinks he doesn't have any game when it comes to dating.
This week, we're joined by Adam Frankel. Adam is a former speechwriter for President Obama and the author of the memoir, "The Survivors: A Story of War, Inheritance, and Healing." The book looks at intergenerational trauma, family secrecy and Adam's process of healing. Adam also lends his support in giving advice to a father struggling with a classic in-laws dilemma.
Our guest this week is David Coggins. David is the editor of the new website, The Contender, and the author of the NY Times bestseller “Men and Style” and “Men and Manners.” His work on travel, style and design has appeared in numerous publications. He is currently working on a new book about fly fishing. He lives in New York. David makes a compelling case for why dressing well is about the people around you instead of about yourself and we spend a long time going into what it means to care about things, be obsessive and take things seriously. Our advice seeker this week needs some help with pleasure and how to truly enjoy one's self.
Our guest this week is Josh Schollmeyer, co-found and editor-in-chief of MEL magazine, which the New York Times has called “the rare men’s magazine that has taken upon itself to investigate masculinity, not enforce it. It gets double points for managing to pull off that project with style and charm, not self-seriousness.”
We welcome Olympic Weightlifting coach and avid bird watcher Nick Novak, who shares some of what he enjoys about being a teacher and the satisfaction of watching people grow as athlete. We also talk about his growing up and his honing of his social skills as an army brat. This week, in lieu of a listener question, Sam asks for advice with a problem he's been struggling with on the show (and off). What could it be? 🤔Hint: (🗣🗣🗣)
In honor of the publication of his book, we're rebroadcasting one of our first episodes with the New Yorker's Andrew Marantz. Andrew's new book is the extremely relevant "Antisocial: Online Extremists, Techno-Utopians And the Highjacking of the American Conversation.
Ali Sethi is a Lahore-born writer and musician. A graduate of Harvard College, he is the author of the acclaimed debut novel ‘The Wish Maker’ and a contributor to The New York Times op-ed page. Ali is also a classically trained vocalist. We discuss differences between intellectual activity and performance, differences in masculinity across cultures and how he draws inspiration from the Sufi tradition to encourage multiple perspectives and interpretations. Our advice question this week is from someone struggling to connect with friends who he's grown apart from.
This week we're joined by Brandon Levi. Brandon is a former Muay Thai fighter and owner of Evolution Muay Thai in New York City. Brandon talks about why he learned to fight as a boy, why he tries not to get into fights and how sick he gets as a coach of other fighters. Later, we get an advice question from a man who is struggling with how to cope with his girlfriend's feelings of insecurity in the relationship.
This week we're joined by writer Ann Friedman, co-host of the podcast Call Your Girlfriend. It's full of advice! Ann gives us some advice on starting a podcast about friendship and also explains Shine Theory and how it can help you manage professional jealousy. Finally we move on to the real advice - we get a question from a recently divorced man who has found he no longer has friends of his own and needs help making some new ones.
We're joined this week by Louis Boria aka Brooklyn Boy Knits. Louis became well known in 2017 when a photo taken of him knitting on his subway commute went viral. We talk about knitting and the importance of doing what something that makes you happy, even when your family doesn't understand. Our question this week is from a dad who wants to protect his son from embarrassing himself on the basketball court.
Jason Rogers is a former silver medalist with the USA Olympic Men's Fencing team. He's also the author of a recent candid essay in Men's Health magazine about his decades-long struggle with performance anxiety and erectile dysfunction in the bedroom. This week, he shares with us about his struggle with erectile dysfunction and how other men can benefit from what he learned in his recovery process. We also get a question from a listener struggling with whether he should commit to his current partner or end the relationship.
On this week's episode, we're joined by Jason Rosario - director of The Lives of Men, host of the web series "Dear Men" and the podcast "Hey Jason." We discuss how he copes with dealing with failure, making the unconventional choice and the challenges of negotiating masculinity as a Black/Latinx man. We also hear from a dad who is struggling with pushback to raising his son in a feminist way.
This week's guest is George Pitagorsky, a teacher and practitioner of yoga and Insight Meditation since the early 1970’s. We talk about misconceptions that people often have about meditation and how to envision meditation beyond just sitting on a mat counting your breath. George brings his patience and wisdom to a very hard advice question - we all agree one of the hardest we've encountered - from a man who is unwilling or unable to forgive himself for his past. Warning: the advice portion of this episode addresses verbal and emotional abuse and may be triggering for some listeners.
Our guest this week is Jules Febre, one of the senior teachers at Jivamukti Yoga in New York City. We talked with him about his complicated path towards practicing yoga and explore gender differences and class differences in practicing yoga. Jules has a really interesting, helpful way of complicating conventional wisdom and suggesting a path that wouldn't have even occurred. Finally, we get to an advice question from a young man struggling with anger in the face of major life changes.
In this episode we speak with David Epstein, author of the New York Times bestseller "Range" (and previously "The Sports Gene") - a book that speaks up for the benefits of being a generalist in an age of hyper specialization. We discuss David's personal trajectory that led to him writing the book, which is broad and fascinating. Related to that, we talk about managing the self doubt that comes when you're unable to stick to one lane in your career. Then we move on to an advice question from a father who is worried about his daughter, who seems to be floundering as she enters post-college life.
We have our first female advice giver on the show and she happens to be an expert in the history of advice! Jessica Weisberg is the author of the book, "Asking for a Friend: Three Centuries of Advice on Life, Love, Money, and Other Burning Questions from a Nation Obsessed." We get into her book and then throw a pretty tough advice question her way about how to handle a friend with some dark secrets.
This week we speak with Zach Miko, the first plus sized male model to sign with a major modeling agency. We discuss his start, growing a thicker skin to deal with trolls and body positivity. We also have two questions this week, both seeking help with jealousy.
Avi and Sam get deep on a classic relationship dilemma. A listener wants to know what to do with a girlfriend who is angry at him for choosing to spend time with his friends instead of with her.
This week we're joined by the New Yorker's Andrew Marantz. Andrew has a book out this fall about the alt-right/alt-light: "Antisocial: Online Extremists, Techno-Utopians And the Highjacking of the American Conversation."
This week we talk with Slate's Aymann Ismail, host of the podcast "Man Up" and creator of the web series "Who's Afraid of Aymann Ismail." We talk about growing up Muslim in America, his career trajectory and get his thoughts about masculinity today. We wrap things up with an advice question from a man who grew up Muslim and first generation American but worries about making serious life choices that are going to disappoint his parents.
This week we talk with Paulie Steinman, the head coach of USA Powerlifting's Classic Masters Team and owner of the beloved Brooklyn gym South Brooklyn Weightlifting Club. We get a master class in dealing with failure and adversity and then Paulie gives some tough love to a listener dealing with impending baldness.
This week we're joined by the writer Thomas Page McBee. Thomas is the author of two books, "Man Alive" and "Amateur," which documents his experience becoming the first trans-man to box in Madison Square Garden. Thomas helps us answer a question from a listener who is drinking and smoking heavily and sounds bored with his life.
Avi & Sam are joined by Slate blogger Ben Mathis-Lilley. We talk about Ben's growing up in Michigan and his career as a journalist. Then, we answer a question about how to handle an out of control bachelor party.
The first episode of the show. We introduce ourselves and answer a question about whether an unconventional relationship is okay.